Love - Art - Disease - Pain - Life-Humanness - "Otherness" In our desensitised society, the artists, the bohemians, poor, discarded, "others", recovering addicts - all are more in touch with their human-ness than the so called mainstream. Despite everything - HUMANNESS, LOVE, LIFE, ART survives. -Jonathan Larson   Archives << current   This is where you stick random tidbits of information about yourself.

The Inner John...   Wednesday, September 17, 2003   We all shine through adversity... I'm listening to John Mayer's new CD and reflecting on the whirlwind of a life that I have right now...and it's only more exciting and stressed and fucked up when I think about how much worse things can get if I let them. Like this morning, for example. I was side-swiped by another car on my way to work. It wasn't a bad wreck...and noone was hurt...but I spent the entire morning waiting for the police to get to the scene. Allison, the girl that hit me was a bit upset...especially when she learned that she had a $150 fine and 4 points on her license. Ouch. What gets me...is the amount of compassion that some of my co-workers lack. I don't expect everyone to be in my face about what happened this morning...but it would be a nice gesture for them to inquire about what happened. Some people are just like that, I suppose. And some people are overly sensitive, like me, I suppose. This isn't a new issue. Alex called me last night and I'm really worried about him. He's a virtual prisoner in his parents house. He ran the cell phone bill up and they think he spends too much time on the internet...so, he's being punished. Not that I disagree with his punishment...(sorry, Alex)...but what's obvious is that his parents don't understand him...who he is...what he wants to be. Hell, Alex doesn't even know these things yet, but he'll discover them soon. 19 is hard...because you don't know where you belong and you have no idea which path to take. What he'll find out is that you can't focus too much on your future at that age. There are too many doors that open up and paths that change course...and it can happen in a night...an hour...a minute...even seconds. Angel Dumott Schunard is under way as next years Broadway Bear creation from RENT. If you haven't seen the show...Angel's "Pussy Galore" second act costume is a real doozy. Think ultra-glam drag queen in a shower curtain dress, long blonde hair, psychedelic tights and pale-pink platform go-go boots. She's a veritable walking pop-icon museum. I'm bummed that I wont be in NYC this weekend for the Broadway Cares/Equity Fights AIDS annual Flea Market and auction. There are better places to be...like in Boston for my bro's wedding. After this...the next step is becoming an UNCLE! That would be extra groovulicious. I need to get crackin' on Grymm's Fairy Tales if I ever hope to get it published. It would be nice to be a "young and hip" illustrator and author while I'm still young and hip, eh? 28 has it's good sides. Like...I still have two years until I'm 30. Ha ha. We're hoping to get a good review in THE STATE newspaper for Sarah Lynn's Christmas Present. If that happens...we'll definitely sell out this year...and I might even become famous among the diaper set...both toddlers and geriatric. 4:44 PM Monday, September 15, 2003   Monday...blah. NYC was a blast! Here's a run-down: My flight to NYC was AWESOME. We only had 12 people on-board, so I sat up in "first class" with Jennifer Aniston, my flight attendant. ha ha. No, really...she looked just like her. The site where the towers stood was really something to behold from the airplane. The lights were shining up in duplicate...to simulate where they once stood. Dave picked me up at the airport and we headed into midtown. It seems like every time I'm in the city...I bring the people with me. Tourists were everywhere...much more than usual for this time of year. Maybe because of the 9/11 memorial thursday? When we left The Manhattan Club, we stopped by The Virginia Theatre to pick up 'Little Shop' posters. I don't know why we didn't wait to get them on Saturday night. Hmmm. We grabbed dinner at The Playwright on W 49th. It's only one of my favorite restaurants in NYC! Their cobb salad is out of this world! We also began the evenings festivities by toasting our Stoli Vanilla's and calling Amanda back home. We passed the phone around as Dan, Robin, Dave, Kevin and I all got to tell her that we wished she was with us. *sniff*. Robin got drunk before dinner was over...and that was only the begining! It wasn't even 10 yet! We left the Playwright and headed back to the hotel...trying to decide what the best plans for the evening were going to be. Everyone wanted to go clubbing...AND I WAS PROMISED STRIPPERS! So, where are three fabulous queers and their understanding best friends to go on a friday night in NYC? CHELSEA!!! Anthony Rapp called that night...and we were trying our damndest to synch our schedules so that we could hang...but it never worked out. I HATE being in the city for only 2 days! Before we hopped a cab down to 21st Ave, we popped in the Redeye bar for some live jazz and...MORE STOLI! Kev and Dave both had chocolate martini's that tasted more like gasoline...and everyone got to feel up on me and Dave's rippling muscles. Dave's bulkier than I am (by nature)...so, I came to the conclusion that I'm now petite. Ha ha. After we left Redeye...robin and Dave were feeling pretty good. The rest of us were somewhat sensible as we tried to pile all 5 of us in a cab. The cab driver refused to take all of us...so Dave and I hailed another cab. It was so cool...just like in the movies...I was like..."FOLLOW THAT CAB...AND STEP ON IT!!!"...ha ha. We had a nice stroll through very, very, very gay Chelsea...and I fell in love, oh, only 27 times before we even got to the club. THE...GUYS...ARE...BEAUTIFUL. The original plan was to hit "KURFEW"...but since the address and the physical building didn't add up...we opted for a new club that had opened across the way, called "JADE". That was a lot of fun. We didn't have to wait very long outside...and it was very nice on the inside. The music was pumpin'...the stoli was plentiful...and we danced for hours. The greatest thing about bars and clubs in NYC is that they are non-smoking. That's my one deterent for going out in the south (especially to sad Columbia clubs). We left JADE, but only after Dan and I got up and danced with the strippers for a little while. On the way back up, we were still craving more dance...so we stopped in "RAWHIDE". This place was really bland in comparison...just your typical "Cheers" type queer bar. We met a few nice guys...who offered to show us around. So, we decided to go to The Roxy, which is one of NYC's biggest and best clubs. By the time we got down there, Dave was so beligerantly drunk and loud that I thought that people were gonna start coming out of their brownstones to shoot us. And me...being the tallest one...would be target numero uno. After we found out that the cover to get into the Roxy was going to be $45 per person...we opted out and caught a couple of cabs over to the village. We wound up at Caliente for drinks and Sopapillas. Yum. It was 4am by this point...and Dan was so sick drunk that he didn't even order anything...he had his head down on the table the whole time. Robin and I started taking pictures with her phone-cam...and it began a running joke all the way home. "Here's Dan drunk at Caliente....Here's Dan drunk and laying down on the street in the village...Here's Dan drunk laying down on the subway platform...Here's Dan drunk laying down on the subway..."...LOL. I'm not kidding, either. I have the pictures to prove it...ha ha. So, we wound up back at The Manhattan Club and passed out. Dave and Robin hooked up. We knew it was gonna happen...there was this obvious sexual tension between them all night...therefore aformentioned hook up. Good thing I gave Dave my extra pair of A&F boxer briefs...ha ha...ewe. Saturday we were up at 9am. Yeah, we all got like 3.5 hours of sleep. Not enough. I remember waking up to Dave without a shirt...and then Robin came and got in bed with me and we cuddled...*yay*. We ate breakfast at Applejacks and everyone decided that rushing for RENT was a good option. None of them had seen the show...and I'm always more than happy to share it with those who haven't seen it. I didn't know how big the rush line was going to be, but I figured that between five people, two of us were BOUND to win...and we only needed 4 tickets (Dave's not into b'way shows). There were about 50/60 people on the sidewalk waiting...and lo and behold....both Dan and Dave got called! We were in! I was so happy...and I knew that everyone was skeptical about the show...even if they had $20 front row seats. We got our tickets...and Robin and I were in seats 105 and 106AA...and Kev and Dan were behind us in BB. We had two hours to kill before the show...so we grabbed some Starbucks and headed over to the garment district. Dave took off and went back home to Brooklyn...*sniff*. Dan needed some trim for a costume that he's working on for a client, and I needed some silver-link for my Broadway Bear. We got what we needed...and headed back to The Nederlander for the show. I met a few RENT fans in the front row...these two particular girls were students at Ithaca...and had seen the show twice before. It's always fun to talk to fellow rentheads. They were familiar with my work with the bears...and that's always cool, too! Exposure for Broadway Cares seems to be getting bigger and better! Well, the show was amazing. There was a new Roger (Ryan Link) that had started that week. He was a little stiff, but hot as hell with a voice to match. I started losing composure during Angel's memorial scene. When I saw Maureen (Christina Fadelle) and Roger start to cry, I was fighting the tears. But when Collins started singing the reprise of "I'll COVER YOU"...I could see him crying...I just started sobbing. It only got worse when they lined up at the end...Angel was missing...and Frenchie Davis was crying so bad as she sang. They all had tears in their eyes...even Matt Caplan (who is a long-time Mark). I could hear people in the audience crying...especially in the first couple of rows. It was amazing...it was so emotional. When the lights dimmed on Collins....I LOST IT. I was shuttering...I felt so overwhelmed. It took a good 20 minutes to right-myself...but I cried off and on throughout the rest of the show, especially during "YOUR EYES". After the show ended...I grabbed Mimi's stash off of the stage (my little ritual when available), and we headed out of the theatre. Dan, Kev and Robin loved the show. They all bought the 2-disc soundtrack on the way out...and I chatted for a while with the kiosk guy (who knew me as "the bear guy"...but I had never really talked to him). We talked and reflected on the show on the way to dinner. Robin found herself strangely relating to Mark...but I asked her which character she couldn't, even in the smallest way, relate to. They all talked about how they hoped "LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS" wasn't going to be be a let-down after "RENT"...and I was only hoping for the best. It started raining as we made our way to dinner...it was very "Little Shop-ish". We wound up eating at this totally groovy brick-oven italian restaurant which turned out to be awesome. I had a bruchetta salad and two pieces of yummy tomato, basil and fresh mozzarella pizza. Oh...and tiramisu for dessert. We took the train back uptown and changed for LITTLE SHOP. Dan borrowed my wicked sassy "iz it u" black linen shirt, since I opted for my blue button down. We got to the theatre...and I noticed right away that everything was so "new". I felt like I was in a Disney theatre...at a theme park. We had great seats...row M in the orchestra center. The show started out great...the actors were wonderful and the sets were awesome. Kerry Butler's AUDREY was a breath of fresh air...because she wasn't trying to be Ellen Greene. It was weird seeing her transition from Belle to Penny Pingleton in HAIRSPRAY to Audrey. She will always sound like Belle, though...no matter what she does! She was one of the most BEAUTIFUL Belle's, but I will always love her as Penny. The original...the BEST! The downfall for LITTLE SHOP is that the plants really weren't all that great. Sure, the final plant is MASSIVE...and the hydraulic system that they use to make her grow to nearly 30 feet high was amazing, but she only gets that big at the very end...for about two minutes. The design of the plant was too cartoonish...and not as threatening as I would have liked it. BUT...here's the thing I have to remember. This is the third major incarnation of "Little Shop". The first being the original off-broadway hit. Then the movie...which was AMAZING in it's own right and will never be topped. Now the official broadway debut of the show...which can't be (for several reasons) a duplicate of either of the previous versions. So, where do you turn next? They made it CAMPY. It seemed like a kids show...which isn't a bad thing. The art direction is nothing short of Disney brilliance. I haven't lost respect for the Jim Henson Creature Shop (who built the puppets and animatronic plants)...only for Marty Robinson, the plants designer (who designed the plants for the first off-broadway version). I mean...the final plant had a beak. Sheesh. The highlight was Douglas Sills as Orin Scrivello...DDS. LOL. He is versatile and funny...and plays EVERY minor character in the show, as well as the dentist. Very funny. After the show we met the cast...and I was shocked to see Alan Menken and his wife. It was so surreal, because standing in front of me was a major contributor to the REASONS why I love Ariel so much. And Belle. And Quasimodo. I've grown up on this man's music...from Little Shop to all of his Disney music: The Little Mermaid, Beauty and the Beast, Aladdin, Pocahontas, The Hunchback of Notre Dame and Hercules. All of a sudden, the show that I had just seen seemed a little insignificant. We went to Hooters after the show for beer and wings...and talked about our dissapointments in the show. Don't get me wrong...it wasn't BAD...it was quite enjoyable, it's just that when you get two 'Little Shop' fans together like Dan and I...who happen to be artists...we're going to pick it apart. We're not shameless, at least. When we got back to the hotel, Kev went straight to bed..and Robin, Dan and I stayed up a bit and talked. We finally hit the sack and I was out like a light. We got up around 9 yesterday morning...had breakfast...and did a little shopping before heading back to the hotel. Dan, Kev and Robin were going to the MOMA, I think? But I got all my junk together and caught a cab out to Laguardia...where my plane was an hour late...and then we sat on the runway another 1.5 hours to be re-routed due to inclimate weather. Sheesh. The flight seemed really long coming home...it always does. I was so wigged out by being around SO MANY people in the airport...and my bags ripping...and the bad sushi I ate...and the loud and obnoxious football fan yelling at the tv screen...that all I wanted to do was get home...and get to bed. Mom picked me up at the airport...and I stopped at Zaxby's for some chicken fingers on the way home. I got in...ate...checked email...and went to bed. So, that was NYC. What a weekend...but now its back to the grind...this grind...for another four days before I leave again this friday morning for Boston. I need to be in the gym every day this week...I'm looking forward to it. I miss my eplipticals and free weights. 11:38 AM