Love - Art - Disease - Pain - Life-Humanness - "Otherness"
In our desensitised society,
the artists,
the bohemians, poor, discarded,
"others", recovering addicts -
all are more in touch
with their human-ness
than the so called
mainstream.
Despite everything -
HUMANNESS, LOVE, LIFE, ART survives.
-Jonathan Larson
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This is where you stick random tidbits of information about yourself.
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Tuesday, October 28, 2003
It feels so good to breathe
I needed to be alone...to collect my thoughts. Just to be me again. I was starting to feel like I was being pulled in a million directions, and a lot of that was my own fault. With my heart and my mind telling me two different things, the conflict was right in front of me.
And now, I've had time to myself, little interruption and very little stress apart from this blasted sinus infection and trying to find a matching pair of socks. Never again will I underestimate the power of solitude, even if it's mostly figurative. I feel better, I think better. I am better. Make the time.
Now I've got a Thursday deadline for this years broadway bear if I expect her to be a key player in the advertising for this years auction. By this weekend I should be totally back to golden.
Some things about John:
I am: Contrary, suspicious and impatient
I think: Too much about how I think too much.
I know: I don't know everything.
I want: To make a difference.
I have: A sinus infection that started three days ago. *cough*
I wish: We could all just get along.
I hate: People who hate.
I miss: Buffy.
I fear: I won't accomplish all I want to before I go.
I hear: People praise me...but I don't always trust their motives.
I wonder: Why I'm not in love.
I regret: Pushing people away.
I love: Meeting new people that I can connect with and learning new things.
I ache: Inside. Only sometimes.
I care: About people I've never met.
I always: Wear my seatbelt.
I am not: Always as I seem to be.
I dance: Therefore I am.
I sing: Really loud in the car.
I cry: to remind me that I really am human. I also cry during Angel's memorial in RENT.
I do not always: "Wash my hand after I use the baffroom. Wait. Don't tell that."-Shirley Q. Liquor
I fight: For thing I believe in.
I write: Because it's cathartic.
I win: And I like it.
I lose:Patience with people who don't help themselves.
I confuse: People...and sometimes myself.
I listen: To alt. rock, my heart, my head and my dad. He's got great advice.
I can usually be found: At work. *sigh*
I need: Alpha Lipoic Acid. I'm out.
I am happy about: 80% of the time.
I should: Be working now instead of filling this out.
NEW DEEP
I'm so alive
I'm so enlightened
I can barely survive
A night in my mind
So I've got a plan
I'm gonna find out just how boring I am
And have a good time
'Cause ever since I tried
Trying not to find
Every little meaning in my life
It's been fine
I've been cool
With my new golden rule
Numb is the new deep
Done with the old me
Talk is the same cheap it's been
Is there a God
Why is he waiting?
Don't you think of it odd
When he knows my address?
And look at the stars
Don't they remind you
Just how feeble we are?
Well it used to, I guess
'Cause ever since I tried
Trying not to find
Every little meaning in my life
It's been fine
I've been cool
With my new golden rule
Numb is the new deep
Down with the old me
Talk is the same cheap it's been
I'm a new man
I wear a new cologne and
you wouldn't know me if your eyes were closed
I know what you'll say
'This will last longer than the rest of the day'
But you're wrong this time
You're wrong
Numb is the new deep
Done with the old me
I'm over the analyzing tonight
Stop trying to figure it out
Deep will only bring you down
You know, I used to be the back porch poet with my book of rhymes
Always open knowing all the time I'm probably
Never gonna find the perfect rhyme
For 'heavier things'
-John Mayer
Whoa.
-JH
4:08 PM
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